Brainsniffles.

I'm sick. I've been sick pushing three days now. I'm not happy about being sick or missing work. To top all of this off the Kia died yesterday on the way home from Danielle and Kris's baby shower. Was not pleased with the behavior of the Kia. I'm a bit saddened about the financial impact that the Kia repairs may have mostly because I took a HUGE cut in pay by changing to day shift. I have not quite toned down our budget and expenses yet but I guess the Kia break down is God's little way of nudging us in the right direction.

On another note the shower was spectacular. A bit stressful pulling it all together, but I didn't show it, quite as much this time. Apparently there were tons of compliments that Danielle's mom Karen received as well as Danielle. I truly do love how it all turned out for Kris and Danielle, quite stunningly amazing in appearance but warming on the inside knowing that everyone truly enjoyed themselves. I will have to blog the photos on a later date.

Ugh. I'm not happy about this sinus infection.

On another note I feel that my life and health is coming along quite well despite the obvious little sidetrack illness. There are a few more tweaks that I must make before becoming pregnant. As far as other situations go I truly am back at wanting to be alone again. Although nice that things are supppossedly hunky dorey, they really are not. I'm not happy with certain things and I do possess the knowledge that only I can change them. I do believe there are going to be some more rather not so modest transformations in certain areas of my life again over the next few months. Time and tiny tests have proven the following:

- People can change, but if they don't want to they don't really change that much.
- Motives tell the truth even if the person doesn't, and are usually easy to see if looking in the right places.
- Some people say they do for others but really are truly self serving, and it shows.
- Being sweet and nice does not erase sefishness.
- There are some people that will go above and beyond for you but only when it serves them.
- People will try the same things over and over and expect different results, its called insanity.
- Sometimes when you realize the true value of a friend its too late.
- I will only be taken advantage of and walked on so much, and believe me just because I dont bitch about it doesn't mean I don't feel it.
- Its not my responsibility to pull your head out of your ass for you.
- People have been made aware of my breaking points, if they want to push me to that point they also no there is no going back.
- Excuses only hold up for so long before they wear off and I realize that it's character that is flawed.

I'm not testing persay but I'm truly allowing others in my life to reveal who they truly are and thus far it really is not pretty. Actually quite disheartening, for them anyway. As I have stated before, I'm working on true friendships. Now that all of the disguises have been ripped away it is quite easy to see the priorities of others. Slightly revolting and shocking, but true that the devil does wear sheeps clothing.